This World

shutterstock-Love-HateIn the cold dawn of light, in this world full of hate and spite where no one knows who is wrong and who is right. In this world of fantasy and flight where everyone is on a ladder trying to reach a great height where all the world comes into sight and little children no longer fly their kites.

In this world of death and destruction where image is more important than love, where we can find no doves. In this world where is the love, where is the living being, in this world that is all seeing.

Where do you and I fit in? where can we make a din or will it be committing a sin just because we are not in. Leave your hate and don’t rate you never know your fate. Love thy neighbours and beyond. There is no magic wand just love and hate that collide. Love is what we should try.

In the cold dawn of light, in this world full of hate and spite where no one knows who is wrong and who is right. In this world of fantasy and flight where everyone is on a ladder trying to reach a great height where all the world comes into sight and little children no longer fly their kites.

In this world of death and destruction where image is more important than love, where we can find no doves. In this world where is the love, where is the living being, in this world that is all seeing.

Where do you and I fit in? where can we make a din or will it be committing a sin just because we are not in. Leave your hate and don’t rate you never know your fate. Love thy neighbours and beyond. There is no magic wand just love and hate that collide. Love is what we should try.

The Comment

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Every time I hear that comment it rips into my heart and every time you say it again it tears my soul apart. I am not good at many things in total or in part, I’ve tried it all from chemistry to art. But all the time you undermine and cut into my mind.

I thought when I left school I had left it all behind, but the world sees I’m fat and that’s how I’m defined: my love; my humour; my kindness and my pain all these things are part of me to which you are blind. I’m not asking you to be nice and kind, I just want you to stop cutting into my mind.

Let me leave the pain behind, of my past I don’t want to be reminded yet you bring back my raw memories with every word and obscenity. You seem to know just where to throw those words of hate and spite, that decimate my being and make me all uptight.

You won’t stand in front of me in case I start to fight, with thirty years of hurt in side waiting to take flight. One little warning to you one day it just might

Tinnitus 

Sitting here it’s quiet or it should be, Tinnitus is troubling me. The constant wringing in my ear let’s me know it’s still here. When it’s quiet or I go to sleep up it let’s the volume creep until this crescendo peeks with pops and bangs and then it hangs right here in the middle of my ear.

My hearing goes and sometimes i don’t know what you say. Lip reading, getting the gist, back filling and finger spelling get me through the day, helping me know what you say. Talk clearly and steady but please don’t talk like I’m a baby carrying a teddy.

When it’s noisy I can’t hear, just the buzzing in my ear, my hearing aid for which the NHS Paid, helps a bit it makes it fade. But once it’s out the ringing is back like some sort of raid. It’s worse at night when my head is laid and eyes shut tight.

Then there’s a knock or a bang I wake with a fright wording if I should run or fight. No one else heard the noise, I regain my poise and realise it’s all in my head. I lay on the bed filled with dread about the rest of the night ahead.

 

Our Heroine

hoodie-banOur heroine Alice Del Mar retrieves a flashlight from her car, hearing gunshots from afar. On with the light breaking the night, she takes flight not knowing what will come into sight.

More shots across the park she lights a cigarette with a spark. The torch beam sweeps the park not knowing what she will find. More gunshots rip at the air she is working blind.

Heart beating faster and faster senses in overload she is a long way from the road carrying her heavy load. Sweeping the paths to the lakes not knowing what’s at stake or what carnage the gunshots leave in their wake.

Onto the woods all dark and mysterious she realises this is getting serious. Night shrouds the woodland, how she wishes she was part of a crowd as the gunshots are getting loud.

Suddenly her flashlight spots a figure in the middle of the light. There was a man in a hooded top taking aim and pulling the trigger wanting to have a pop at a beautiful fox. He turned the gun on Alice del Mar she wants to run but won’t make it to the car.

She freezes not knowing his next move, would he shoot or scoot. The alarm in his eyes and shaking of his arm raises Alice’s inner alarm she knows she may come to some harm. She turns off the torch and gets down on her haunch and ready to move away. Alice is not sure if she will live anymore and if this will be her last day.

On the floor to the right of her she feels a large stick, it’s in her hand with one gentle flick as she hears the dead man’s click. The gun has run out of rounds. She is up off the ground and onto the gun with her big stick two punches and a good hard kick.

The gunman falls to the ground ammunition spread all around. He’s writhing in pain trying to retrieve the gun again. She brings down the stick and starts to pound. She screams and screams but no one’s around.

She runs into the night driven by adrenaline caused by fright not lead by the beam of her flashlight. She keeps on running until the woods are out of sight, the car is ahead she is using all her mite.

She gets to the car, unlocks it and falls into the seat, gasping for breath and feels the heat. She gets on her phone to report home and ask for the police to meet. Our heroine Alice Del Mar has made it back to her car. This is her biggest adventure so far.